Therapy With Naruto
by FanficMonster101
Summary: The Naruto characters have been having problems...and what better person to fix them than Tsunade's crazy neice? Warning - rated T for a reason!


Kokio flung open the doors. "Put your hands where I can see 'em and give me the money," she shouted.

Tsunade felt a sudden tremor from beneath her and muttered, "Kokio." She flew down the stairs and ran into the lobby. She groaned at the sight in front of her. "Kokio...you can't pretend to be a bank robber in the hospital," she explained. The green haired woman blinked. "Tsunade? I'm in the hospital? I thought this was the dentist's office..."she pondered, looking around, then realizing it was indeed the 'sick peoples place'. The secretary grumbled 'ass' under her breath, still retrieving the papers she had flung at Rock Lee. (A/N: Do not ask me why Rock Lee is in the hospital lobby.....maybe he is showing off his youthful bandages......of springtime......)

Kokio seemed not to hear. Tsunade suddenly thought of an actual useful purpose for her niece. A therapist.

Oh yes. The Rookie Nine were coming in today, because of complaints from the Jonin teachers about their student's...ahem...'colorful' characteristics. Tsunade grinned evilly. Kokio did the same. Tsunade giggled evilly, and so did the younger woman. Suddenly they both burst out in maniacal laughter. "Why are we – MWAHAHA – laughing maniacally?" Kokio managed between HAHA's. Tsunade stopped laughing, though a clever smirk was still on her face. "Oh, Kokio, we are just going to have a little fun with our ninja..." she said, laughing evilly again. Kokio shrugged, not understanding, but resumed cackling sinisterly.

Rock Lee doing 100,000 push ups in the background. "Yosh!!!!!!!!"

Kakashi's Sharingan eye twitched. He was seriously thinking of using it on his students.

Naruto was shouting.

Sakura was screaming.

Sasuke was, of course not saying anything.

Kakashi actually mostly wanted to use it on Sasuke. Damn boy had stolen his emergency 'I'm-taking-my-students-to-the-shrink-because-they-are-all-friggin-PSYCHO' earplugs.

He cursed that Uchiha boy seventy million times.

"Hey Kakashi why do we have to go see a therapist I mean me and Sakura-chan are perfectly sane but Sasuke-teme is all messed up in the head because his dumb brother decided to be even more dumb and kill their dumb clan so Sasuke found him in their dumb house with their parents dumb corpses on the floor and Sasuke dumbly looked into his dumb eyes and was dumbly trapped in a dumb genjutsu which made him go dumb so he was set on killing his dumb brother to avenge his dumb clan Believe it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Kakashi cringed, really wishing he was ten miles away where Naruto's voice would only be slightly very annoying.

Sakura sniffed and caused and explosion somewhere in Russia. (A/N: Yes she is that loud....ouch no wonder Sasuke leaves XD) And opened her mouth...

Fearing brain damage, Kakashi quickly tried the Sasuke maneuver. "Hey Sakura, Sasuke said you can go over to his house and raid his underwear drawer." He said, mentally cheering at his genius.

Sakura squealed, causing Mount Olympus to erupt. She sped off quickly, Sasuke shouting after her, "Watch it, Sakura! I have Anti Crazy Uncool Flat-Chested Fangirl Repellent-soaked guard dogs!" he yelled after her.

Kakashi giggled. Hehe...it was fun to mess with his students.

Tsunade jumped in front of them, causing Naruto to scream and wave his arms around wildly. Tsunade grinned. "Hello, and welcome to your yearly check up for your completely horny teenage hormones. Dr. Kokio will see you know." She barely managed to suppress a bunch of vomit. Naruto started screaming. "I wanna go first so that I can tell everyone about my feelings for Sakura-chan Believe it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

The ground shook. Tsunade nodded quickly and eye twitched, huge smile still plastered on her face. She ushered Naruto inside. Anything to stop the agonizing pain......!

Naruto stopped screaming and bounded up the stairs.

Little did he know.....

Tsunade cackled out loud, and Sasuke and Kakashi joined in. "What – HAHAHA – are we cackling about?" Sasuke gasped. Tsunade just smiled knowingly.


End file.
